Being fat is not very fun, and yes, I have made the choices to get me here, and clearly, I am not that motivated to make "good" choices in the food and exercise department. So, when you fail, make jokes and you will feel better. So, here are some of my "fat girl fantasies" for you:
1-to be a size 16 (some of us reach for the stars, some of us are just reaching for another cookie!)
2-to not have to shop at Lane Giant.
3-one day maybe designers will realize that big girls DO NOT need BIG, floral prints and bright colors. One day someone will be "BRILLIANT" and continue normal clothing into bigger sizes. There will be no "women sizes". Instead, they will just extend the sizes of their "normal clothes". Wouldn't that just be dreamy? That would be much better than current thought---(let's find the most hideous prints and colors and make them into clothes for big girls!) Really, I know what is cute, and what looks good, they just don't have those styles and choices for the "big" girls. If you don't believe me, go check out the big girl section of the store.
4-cap sleeves are not so cute on the big girl. When you got big momma arms, they need a touch of coverage. Designers, please don't give us tiny, little girl arm sleeves ---- we are trying to be respectful of the general population and not require them to look at our arms! Help us on this one!
5-cameras would automatically make you look thin, no matter what angle you take the picture from! C'mon all you techies, can't you figure that one out yet?
5-In my fantasy world, my son would not ask me if I have a baby in my stomach. When I say no, he would not ask me why my stomach is so big. I would no longer have to answer, I am just fat, sorry to disappoint you, but---no baby. Some days I wish I was getting a fringe benefit from a big stomach---but no, I am done with the baby thing!
6-I would love to get in a bathing suit, go swimming, unrestrained, without feeling major self-consciousness. So, for now, my fantasy is that they would have an underground tunnel into one part of the pool, so you could just "show up" in the water, without the "big reveal". Maybe that way my kids could go swimming in a real pool once in a while!
7-I don't really love carnival rides, but it would be nice to not have to worry about being able to fit onto a ride or squashing your child as the ride pushes and pulls you from one side to the other. (Brownies and twinkies have been known to specifically help you deal with this concern!)
8-Could they not come up with a better term than morbid obesity to describe some of us? Seriously, morbid. There has got to be a better word. All the terms all just seem so negative---there has got to be a more kind, loving, sweet way to describe a growing US population! C'mon, they have done it for nearly all other groups, make us a cute little acronym or something. We all enjoy a little denial some days! Help us out on this one!
9-My last fantasy, is that this little, petite, girl that is trapped in my big fat momma body would be able to escape one day. Maybe not anytime soon. Some days she screams to come out louder than other days. What is great, is when you feed her, she shuts up!
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3 comments:
These are so funny.
I know I have mentioned that this year I've done a lot of internet reading about weight and weight loss and all that -- you should remind me to tell you about some of the things I've learned. (I think I've given up on trying to put it all on my blog because it's a lot.) But here's one thing that I know will be hard to believe but I PROMISE it is backed up by real science: the obesity "epidemic" is a MYTH, and studies show that fat people actually have better survival rates than thin people after a serious illness. People on the very extreme end of obesity do have decreased survival rates, BUT, they are still better than people at the extreme thin end of the scale.
I do not mean to be gleeful about thin peoples' bad health or anything, but the almost universal idea that fat people are all less healthy is just not backed up by any research. It is so hard for people to accept this that they are actually calling this the "obesity paradox" because it just goes against peoples' deeply held beliefs.
Now, it's also true that even moderately increased activity levels can greatly increase health outcomes, so that's a very worthwhile health goal (even without expecting weight loss results.) I definitely need to work on that.
I learned most of this from a very thorough science blogger who really looks at all the studies and what they really say compared to how the media and the weightloss product lobbying groups report them -- it's a whole lot of reading but for me it was fascinating -- it's called "Junkfood Science" (that's a clickable link) and there's a whole series on the "obesity paradox" which you can find near the bottom of her list of links on the right. Here's the first one in the series to start with.
Like I said, it's a lot of material to read, but it's a great resource if you want to feel a lot better about yourself. Although like every woman in our demographic I would love to be thin, over time reading that blog has really helped me change the way I judge myself and the way I think about health and nutrition. Frankly, there is just a whole lot of conventional wisdom out there that is wrong and hurtful.
Okay, well that was a long rant, but I hope any of it's useful. :)
I so understand all of these fantasies!! I have however found some good clothing alternatives to Lane Giant...Eddie Bauer online, J Jill online, sometimes Christopher & Banks, and I just placed an order online through Old Navy. Who knew they did plus size clothing. Try any of these to see if they give a lift to your wardrobe!
Love, love, LOVE your comment about the floral prints. Love it. Yeah, I was in fashion Bug today, and looking at their "Right Fit" jeans. I then realized they had "Right Fit" misses and plus, and I was in the wrong section. Walked over to the plus section... hey, where did the cute cuts go? Kill me.
I like Target and Old Navy online for the nicer clothes in bigger sizes. Then I don't feel like I have to go to Lane Bryant.
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